Wednesday, 25 April 2012


Put a banana in your ear 'a banana in my ear?' put a ripe benana right into your favourite ear!!!!

Trust me, it really works. I'm not lying. Just put it right in there, it needs to be ripe as well otherwise it'll just smoosh in your ear.. Actually it's a banana it'll do that no matter what it looks like. Unless of course it's frozen (or fake...). I tried it, it really does make you feel better, turns that grumpy frown right upsidedown! Into a weird looking upsidedown miffed face.
I'm lying, i haven't really tried it. I don't really know why i'm trying to sell the idea to you, it sounds horrible! The banana would justsmoosh into your ear, firstly acting like edible earmuffs or even ear plugs. Then you would realise how much of a mess and a mistake you had made and you'd try to clear it up. But you're ears are a tricky place to clean, thats why everyone has so much earwax :P, and you KNOW that you'll miss some without noticing.

That's where it starts.

The little pieces of banana and earwax smoothie that you leave behind in your noggin starts to ripen
And ripen
And ripen.
Sooner or later the banearwax starts to grow a little bit of fungus i call mould. Your ears slowly become more and more uncomfortable as the decomposing banearwax shrinks in size but the green fuzz grows. People start to see it sticking out of the holes in the side of your head but you can't hear the warnings or complaints. It's already too late for you.

Not only do you get an eventually fatal infection in your face, but you spend a good few months in lonliness because you think no one wants to talk to you.

You die alone and disfigured.

All because charlie was the banana king.

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